Student Life

So, there's a student meeting in my office at work. I don't mind it, in general... you know, the incessant banter, the obnoxious "he said, she said, OH EM GEE DID YOU HEAR ABOUT SANDRA?!" stuff... but there's this ONE GIRL. I mean, she talks faster than any okie I have encountered thus far. In fact, I bet she'd put the majority of the east coast to shame. She's a serority girl/valley girl/asian... the combination equal MIND NUMBING CHATTER. Oh, and to add to it she literally calls EVERYONE her best friend. And I mean EVERYONE. When the group is talking about that special guy, she'll proclaim something like, "Oh yeah, I totally saw him at the fair the other day, and he asked me about our algebra homework, we're TOTALLY BEST FRIENDS NOW!" And everyone BUYS THIS SHIT... "oh really? that's so awesome!" Then two minutes later she's talking about how her best friend isn't talking to her and it's breaking her heart... due to some drama from the last frat party or some shit. And again, everyone swoons, "oh you should tell her if she's your best friend!" SERIOUSLY?! no. So, I was talking to Benny online, and the convo went like this:

me: "For FUCK SAKE that asian student is back in here for a meeting. The one with a voice that makes me wish I were being crucified, covered in honey, and put into a field of fire ants, rather than continue to listen to her. And she talks SO FAST. I've never heard an okie talk this fast!"

Benny: "Punch her in the head."